11.29.2007

Honestly > A Humble Change of Heart

I was going to write about politics...which morphed into religion...which led to the question, "What happened to Rev. Ike?"

I remember Rev. Ike from my childhood ghetto of the 70s. I think some relatives of mine probably got caught up in his scams. Apparently I'm not alone since the interwebs is FULL of stuff about Rev. Ike. In fact the Rev. Ike probably invented the godamn interwebs.

"The Bible says that Jesus rode on a borrowed ass. But I would rather ride in a Rolls Royce than to ride somebody's ass!"

Well I am here to tell you that the good Right Reverend Dr. Frederick J. Eikerenkoetter II, Th.B., D.Sc.L., Ph.D., is not only alive, but doing very well. How can anyone stay mad at Rev. Ike (unless you got caught up in his scams)?

I mean the man came up with "Thinkanomics." What did you come up with, huh? Answer me that!

Lookie:
"The LACK of money is the root of all evil."

"Forget about the pie in the sky, get yours here and now."

"Everything is a condition of the mind."

"If it's that difficult for a rich man to get into heaven, think how terrible it must be for a poor man to get in. He doesn't even have a bribe for the gatekeeper."
I mean the man has ringtones, dammit!

I want to be Rev. Ike.