4.02.2007

Unemployment Diary - People

So, today I did some very hard work. Let's just sum it up in two words: A) Basement,
B) Attic. Bonus word: "C" is for complete (for all you other homeowner chumps).

Now my studio space is in good shape again and I can make music and do photography in those spare moments that I'm not actively searching for gainful employment. Hold on, I just laughed so hard I'm having a snot issue. Where was I, oh yeah, gainful employment (reaches for tissue again).

Anyway, gave me time to think today. People are funny. Responses to my quick departure were met in one of five ways (I've categorized them for you):

  1. Thank God: "God's will." The God people are convinced that everything happens according to some divine plan and surprises are never surprises because God never improvises on His script. Can I have a copy of said "script?" I may have some notes for ya, old pal. Some minor edits. The God squad pray for you. And, they ask/make you pray with them. Usually, I immediately break into "tongues."
  2. The Optimists. "You'll land on your feet," "Think of this as an 'opportunity'," and "It was probably for the best." For the best? Shit, money's for the best. I don't need optimism, I need money. Optimism doesn't pay my mortgage. Optimists email you their "contacts" (at the elevator repair company and the shoe shine cart, thanks guys).
  3. Aren't You Forgetting Someone? These people hate to see you go because their lives will now suck at work. The gossiping, the mischief, the inside joking. Now, they need new playmates (who won't rat 'em out to HR, that is). Their initial pre-thought reaction goes like, "What am I going to do now?" Er, now you're going to send your children to college, moneybags. My friends here buy lunch.
  4. Shocked Into Silence: These kind dears stop by the office, take one step in and freeze. Tears often well, but there isn't a word they can say. Just stare too long and too earnest into your eyes. Mostly they fear if it could happen to you, it surely could happen to them. The SIS team are dear, sweet, and scared for their lives. SIS-ers leave greeting cards.
  5. High-Fucking-Five: No work, no schedules, no bathing. The HFFs know that your life is suddenly free and happy. No more teachers, no more books.... HFF-ers come by and laugh, hug, dance and high five you because they were just hoping it could be them. To them, you somehow lucked out by getting laid-off. HFFs buy drinks.

Actually, everyone was quite sweet. People can be viciously nice when they need to be. I love 'em all and miss 'em all already. Send money (seriously, I'm broke! I spent my last few bucks on a new 9600 baud modem).